Out of Reflection and Into Action

As 2010 slowly creeps into our life, I find myself experiencing several different emotions all at once:

I am sad to see the season come to a close. Packing up the nativity, tucking Jesus into a rolled up paper towel and nestling this little package into a box of packing peanuts, I wonder if we "made the most of the season." Did we reflect enough? I feel like I just unpacked this thing!

I am relieved. Relieved that the thoughts and anticipations of January can finally manifest themselves in the act of entering back into our "normal" daily routine. There is a point to which all the reflection must become action. As James encourages us:

"...be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing." (James 1:22-25)

I am thankful for the reflections that came with December, but we have entered January; a new month and a new year. It is time for us to allow the reflections of Advent and Christmas to change our lives.

So, I am glad to be sitting in my apartment on this Tuesday morning with a hot cup of tea. The new year has brought with it a new routine for me. Not going to work, but rather working at home is a strange thing to get used to. My younger sister is here visiting us this week, and I am thankful for her company to help me through this transition. She has been a calming reminder to me that though this unemployment comes through unfortunate circumstances, I can and should make the most of it. I know and trust that a new job will come along, and I refuse to look back on this time wishing I had done more with it. So each day will begin with time for reflection so as to fend off the terrible anxiety that pains me when I wake up in the morning without a place to go. After reflection comes time to work on finding a job. Once I feel that the attainable things for the day have been accomplished, I will enjoy developing the discipline of making my home a respite, a passion I long to understand. Can being at home and caring for my husband and future family be a virtue? I plan to use this time to find out.

Today I have a lot of unemployment paperwork to sift through and a cover letter and resume to submit for the one lead I am hanging onto. With an empty coffee cup at my side and a closed Bible already been read, it's time to tackle the work that is before me for this day. And once it has been accomplished, I will enjoy my sister and the kitchen. I have gallons of pumpkin puree from the Thanksgiving centerpiece that I finally roasted. So far we've eaten pumpkin lasagna and baked pumpkin muffins. Today, I think we will try our hand at mini pumpkin cheesecakes for Dan's office :)

And so begins the living out of the day to day. I have no idea what is in store for me and how long this season will last. I only hope that I will look back on it and be glad that I experienced it and excited to move forward without regrets. I hope to be able to reflect and meditate here, and that any of you who are reading would join me in discovering what it means to be "doers" of the word and learning how to choose it daily.